Songezo Zibi
This article appears on Page 15 of the Sunday Independent (20 January 2013)
News of the gang rape of a girl
looking to enrol at the University of Pretoria last week offered a glimpse into
the soul of a country increasingly accepting a horrific normality it should
reject with all its might. The woman’s story made news, but on the same day
countless others suffered the same fate elsewhere – and life carried on as
‘normal’.
Yet more were savagely beaten,
stabbed and mutilated before and after the humiliating crime. In those
instances too, a society too familiar with the horror to be shocked, shook its
collective head and moved on. Some suffer the further and continuing punishment
of being rejected by the men in their lives, and are often accused of having
created the conditions under which the rapes and violence took place, and of
being too filthy to associate with.
The stigmatization of rape
survivors creates a double-edged sword. First it makes it necessary for most to
opt to be anonymous even when they report the crime for criminal investigation.
As a result they remain a mere statistic, people with no names who don’t get
the full empathy being somebody’s daughter elicits. Second it creates a
devastating conspiracy of silence in which countless women know they have been
and are victims but dare not share it beyond very tight, trusted circles.
Estonian thinker, Slavoj Žižek’s powerful theory of
violence is probably the best upon which to understand South Africa’s macabre
orgy of sexual violence against women, including infants and girl children. It
also can help us understand why so many of us are able to sleep at night
despite such a crisis.
Žižek says visible violence, what
he calls subjective violence – like a man raping a woman, brutally assaulting
and killing her or any other human being is subjective violence. This is
generally the outcome of what he terms objective violence, conditions and
structures in society that are regarded as pillars of normality but which are
inherently a violation of the freedoms and security of others. Alternatively
they set up the conditions under which the violation of others will become
possible, acceptable or elicit only token outrage which fizzles out as soon as
the next incident hits the news.
Understanding the origins of our
society’s contagious rape culture is our best hope in fighting it, but we have
to be prepared to slay big holy cows. These are institutions, rules and mores
we believe give us a sense of normality and cohesion but also serve the dual
purpose of making us a society that cannibalises itself through the most
horrific violence against its own.
Aspects of our different
traditions and religions, and their influence on our politics and economic
structures contribute in many ways towards perpetuating a culture that knows no
race or ethnicity – and is entirely geared towards validating the assumed but
incorrect genetic superiority of the male. It defines female propriety as
accepting the role of second best, of modesty, waiting your turn and remaining
silent lest you are regarded as too forward or loose. It is an invisible
violence inculcated into the mind of every child as representing the virtues of
true social order.
Organisations that are trying to
fight the epidemic are privately regarded as hysterical because they allegedly
exaggerate the problem. This apologetic mode posits that there are only a few
misfits in society who perpetuate gender-based violence in an otherwise
gender-equal society. It is a position littered with qualifications in order to
avoid the contradictions it creates and encounters often. It prevents society
from taking stock of what it does daily to reproduce on a large scale a
community of males who believe women are inherently inferior.
The perpetuation of female
victimisation is everywhere. In the workplace not only are women getting paid
less than male counterparts doing the same work, they are also expected to
serve tea, take minutes and other tasks considered too demeaning for their male
colleagues. Such expectations are as irrational as males being prepared to open
the door for a lady but revolted at the idea of carrying her purse or pouring
her tea. We live with this contradiction because we are taught from an early
age that it is normal, and any critical inquiry into why this bizarre normality
needs to survive one more generation is actively discouraged.
More disturbingly many children
grow up with false notions of sexual relations. They are raised up to believe
that sexual intercourse is for the exclusive pleasure of the male; that male
promiscuity is a sign of virility and masculinity, but the idea of a woman
doing exactly the same is seen as abominable. It is hardly the case that both
genders are treated equally in discouraging promiscuity in general.
We participate in traditions and
religions where the male is entrenched in a superior position just for being
male while angry and perverse moral judgement awaits those who dare challenge
such notions. It is considered heretical to challenge these because they are
perceived to disturb the sense of social normality we have known for
generations. However this normality is precisely the circumstance under which
in our context at least, we are faced with an onslaught against women which
shall in the end give us a society of hypocritical robots who have neither the
capacity to reflect on its origins or the will to put an end to it.
Of course, not every country has
a rape epidemic like South Africa. But if we accept that rape is a crime of
power and dominance rather than natural sexual desire it is impossible to
dismantle this rape culture if we do not tackle honestly the destructive
influence of patriarchy and its apologists. It is even less likely when our
political parties and leaders hypocritically claim to want to alter the status
of women for the better but simultaneously take decisions which undermine
confidence in women. Some use their political positions to feed grotesque egos
which find validation in female sexual conquest.
When in 2009, Western Cape
premier and Democratic Alliance leader Helen Zille appointed an all-male
provincial cabinet she insisted that appointing women would have amounted to
tokenism as none were “fit for the purpose”. It was a mind-boggling justification
which suggested that in the entire Western Cape there was not a single woman
fit enough to warrant appointment to her Cabinet. Apart from this being
impossible, it demonstrated abject failure on Zille’s part to recognise the
profundity of the moment she faced. It required that she do what was necessary
and just for the advancement of society, not just women.
There have also been several
instances of senior politicians demonstrating sexual predatory instincts by
preying on young women believing that their powerful political positions
amounted to some kind of sexual advantage. Former ANC Chief Whip, Mbulelo
Goniwe, is perhaps the most prominent example of this but his punishment for
sexually harassing a vulnerable young woman member of staff was an exception
rather than the norm.
Men routinely harass female staff
members and colleagues, often invading their personal space without missing a
heartbeat. It is not unusual for some men to expect sexual favours from women
in order to get the career advancement their male counterparts don’t have to do
special favours for. Refusals are followed by accusations of arrogance, being
uppity or in several instances – of being a slut anyway.
These things persist because they
are regarded as normal. In many ways rape is the final devastating act, a
shocking toss of the coin between itself and being killed or dying. After all
the humiliation and rejection many women suffer as a consequence of being raped
is a horror that causes many to wonder if dying wouldn’t have been better.
Women are also often complicit in
their own oppression by accepting a false normalcy under the guise of
everything from political discipline to tradition. This battle will not be won
if they don’t reject this lie in both its conception and its manifestations,
and refuse to cooperate with any social, economic and political structure which
seeks to relegate their position to second class citizens who deserve second
class rights in their own society.
We shall also fail until the
position of women in general becomes a central, urgent political and moral
issue. To do that we need leaders in communities, business and in politics that
are not so easily given to what Žižek calls “the neighbour thing”, where
someone we profess to and are assumed to love is actually treated like an enemy
in our subliminal actions.
Entrenched subliminal actions
require constant shock treatment, and nothing short of a radical revolt against
our backward traditionalism upon which we premise our sense of normality will
deliver any tangible results. It is precisely because of the patriarchal
traditionalists in our midst who are looked upon to lead that we have such a
moral crisis on our hands.
We should all be sickened towards
revolution.
Ends.
Songezo Zibi is the convenor of
the Midrand Group.